I am West Virginia

Thanks for indulging me.

7:00pm Jun 20

I am looking for feedback, positive or negative, it all helps. Thank you!



I am West Virginia

I am the Kanawha, the Elk, the New River.
I am West Virginia.

I am the roaring white waters, the bubbling stream,
the winding creek.
I am West Virginia

I am Charleston, I am Chesapeake, I am Morgantown.
I am West Virginia.

I am the waitress, the bus driver, the coal miner.
I am West Virginia.

I am the Eagle guarding our Capitol, I am the Hawk gliding over Hawk’s Nest, I am the Blue Bird in the meadows of Dolly Sods.
I am West Virginia.

I am the hollows, the valleys and the mountains.
I am West Virginia.

I am tragedy and heartbreak, I am Blair Mountain, I am Matewan, I am Monongah, I am Sago.
I am West Virginia.

I am the strength, the hope and the resilience of all my people. I am proud, strong and true.

I am forever West Virginia.

- Sharon Kreiling
© December 2007

Hey Sharon!

Diane Tarantini here. For what it's worth, I like your poem a lot. However, I do not have any training in poetry whatsoever. I do not know what to tell you as to whether it's "good" or "bad" as poetry goes.

Hope you get an expert opinion shortly.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read it. I have gotten a few private messages and people do seem to like it. One published author said that he feels I am holding back. Not sure what to do about that.

Hey Sharon:

Been at beach. You're welcome though I doubt I'm much help. I'm guessing the published author sensed there was more (emotion maybe?) "between the lines" that you weren't expressing. Maybe (and really, I'm a poetry idiot) WHY are you writing the poem? It feels declarative to me--are you happy (or the opposite) to announce those things? Or, do you feel like there's someone out there who NEEDS to hear them?

Oh, and bluebird should be written like this, I'm pretty sure8)

And also, in my opinion, those really long lines should be broken up a bit. Wait for confirmation on that though. You know why, right? 'Cause I'm a poetry know-nothing-at-all.

That's it! You hit the nail on the head! I did not know why I wrote it till you asked me and then it was as clear as can be. I am so proud of West Virginia and I think people need to hear this poem. I want people to realize what a great state this is and that we are resilient, proud, strong and true! I think it is powered by my childhood. My parents were in the group that headed to Ohio for jobs. Where I went to school I was made fun of for my accent and called a stupid Hillbilly. This is my way of saying "You don't know anything about MY state!" You can't possible know how much you have helped me. and I am Happy!